In one unique moment every day we are allowed a glimpse at our lives through somewhat fresh eyes. The moment we wake up, transitioning from the real-feeling world of dreams to the real-feeling world of consciousness, we quickly (maybe one or two seconds) size up our lives and evaluate our fortune. I think that short-term outcomes often carry particularly strong weighting on our happiness during the day and longer-term realities have similar control over our estimation of our lives in our first waking moments.
Mornings have always been a time of strong emotions for me. As a chronic homebody, going to college freshman year was an emotional affair. The days and nights were good, but I would always wake up sick to my stomach – is this my new reality, can’t I just go back to my house in St. Louis and my friends and girlfriend from high school? New, positive changes to my life have had opposite effect – every morning I get to re-remember the new wonderful life I have.
Having quit my job on Monday, I’ve now had two opportunities to wake up fresh from dreams about complete randomness where my absolute reality had nothing to do with the physical world I live in. The verdict? I’ve never felt freer. I feel not just free from the job itself (which, believe me, is no meaningless thing to be freed from) but free from the metered and somewhat pre-determined path I have been on my whole life and could have easily stayed on in finance. It’s liberating to realize you can quit your job and not only wake up the next day, but that you can feel reenergized and re-motivated.
So far the decision feels incredibly right and even belated. M I’ll be up there for lunch at like 12:30.