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Last week, I sorta received a job offer. It was sorta almost exactly what I wanted to do. I was sorta in the perfect mindset to start doing something else. Problem is, they sorta wanted me to make a decision immediately. So, I sorta turned it down.

Am I sorta an idiot? Probably.

But on the bright side, it has inspired me to work on my writing skills in two languages that I should probably be more proficient in – programming and, uhm, English.

Quick aside, there will be lots of changes here as I work on my former skill and change the layout of the site. Ideally, two posts will appear side-by-side,  the header image will improve, there will be a time stamp so you can see that I posted this at 5am, etc, etc. But since I broke the site over 7 times already and it’s approaching sunrise and I sorta have to go to work tomorrow, I’ll save my to-do list for another day. Hey J, if you want to embark on your own oft-mentioned programming adventure – feel free!

Anyways, what did I do on the first day, post-J? I called his number several times from different people’s desks and freaked out our secretary. I thought about doing work, avoided it, thought about it some more, and by the time I was in the mindset to actually do it, face-time ended, so I left.

Random, crazy work task(s) of the day: I lugged in two heavy boxes of deal toys originally addressed to J (because you know, he quit and all), set one (a toy, not a box) on my director’s desk, took a picture of it and sent it to him (because you know, he’s on his honeymoon and all).

Dichotomous, somewhat profound event(s) of the day: We had a surprise visit from an incoming first-year analyst, all bright-eyed and filled to the brim with eagerness. A more disillusioned investment banking analyst would laugh with predictable cynicalness (cynicism?). But I’m more worried for him than anything else – it’s the most naive and eager ones who crash the hardest. On the other hand, I came in with some skepticism and with clear goals in mind. As a result, I’ve maintained my air of even-keeled-ness throughout my analyst career (or I’d like to think I have) by not letting the craziness around me affect me. Case in point:

Asian girl: blah blah blah…her ex-bf…blah blah blah
Asian girl: i was like. um .. yeah are you joking
Me: w/e
Me: im over it
Asian girl: what exactly are you over
Asian girl: LOL
Me: its my defense mechanism for anything i dont want to talk about
Me: the list is gettin quite high

And that, my friends, is how I deal with problems!

-M

P.S. Just to be clear, I’m not bitter or angry about my job. Just that, the fact that I have the energy and/or capacity to stay up fiddling with php and writing some random thoughts on wordpress probably means I’m in the wrong career at the moment. Just some food for thought….